


Ring around the Rosie.

by youngjusticewriter



Series: Fluctuat Nec Mergitur [2]
Category: Naruto
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, BAMF Haruno Sakura, Character Death, Gen, Haruno Sakura-centric, I’ll tag more characters when they show up, Jaded Sakura, Mystery, Naruto is a bad Hokage, Post Series, or least that’s what I’m going for
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-04-27
Updated: 2019-04-27
Packaged: 2020-02-08 13:13:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,124
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18623971
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/youngjusticewriter/pseuds/youngjusticewriter
Summary: And Sakura? Sakura deserved to piece herself back together through gritted teeth. People couldn’t fix each other in that way. In the end it was their choice to acknowledge that they were broken and try to fix it. Will they always be able to fix themselves?No.(Sakura couldn’t wholly knit herself back to the girl she use to be despite an earnest part of her that wanted to go back to being that girl.)But they tried. They tried.





	Ring around the Rosie.

Nausea curled into itself like an old dog in her stomach as the knife slid through the fruit on the cutting board (It wasa cheap thing with a cherry blossom tree on it of all things. It's worn, the bright color having been somehow washed away, yet Sakura kept the cheap thing. Probably because Naruto had given it to her though Sakura suspected it was Hinata who had bought the house warming gift.) Sakura hated the food the hospital served so that's why she packed her own meal to didn't eat later. Eating first thing in the morning was never appealing to Sakura so she simply prepared herself something for later when her nightmares didn't have her appetite in its claw. After packing it the box, Sakura went to wash her hands. The juice of the cut fruit was red but it was too watery to be blood; too easy to wash off compared to blood too. Next Sakura grabbed the cutting board and knife to clean. 

Sakura's mornings were quiet affairs since she had moved out of the apartment and into this little house. It, despite popular opinion from both ninja and civilians alike, wasn't because she was planned on settling down with Sasuke and reviving the Uchiha clan. It was because of there were only so many noise complaints the apartment building manager could overlook - the Hokage's best friend or not. Those had actually been the man's words much to Sakura's ire. She didn't work under Lady Tsunade to become better, to walk besides her teammates than behind them, just to be the Hokage's best friend or the Uchiha's...well most people didn't know what to call them. Girlfriend was apparently deemed to be too trivial for whatever they were and, despite Sakura buying a house, they weren't even engaged which was something Naruto continuously needled about despite the years that had past. Most people wouldn't have believed that Naruto use to have a crush on her for years with how he acted like a mother who wanted grandchildren when it came to Sasuke and Sakura's love life. 

Once she put the dishes in the dish drain Sakura then dried her hands on a kitchen towel. First thing in the morning were always something to her. The war had only been a few days yet it still left a scar on Sakura despite the time that had passed. Maybe it shouldn't be surprising. Sakura wasn't the only person who struggled in the aftermath and that was why her and Ino had opened a clinic for the younger kids who had fought. 

The world disappeared into darkness as Sakura closed her eyes. Kids, she thought. Sakura's chest shook with laughter she never let out of her mouth because she didn't feel any humor. Kids. They all, Sakura and her friends, had been kids despite being seen as adults in the eyes of their government. And now kids were going to be continued to being seen as such. If Sakura ever voiced her thoughts to anyone besides Shizune they would be blamed on her being a daughter of two civilians. That wasn't true though. It wasn't till the war that those thoughts crept on Sakura. Because Sakura wasn't just a soldier, she didn't just punch a god in her face, no, Sakura had been medic, the medic in fact, during the war that only lasted a few days. Sakura had been a medic in the years following because, unlike the war, the wounds couldn’t be miraculously healed in just a few days. What added salt in Sakura’s wounds (ones no one seemed capable of noticing were there - that they were festering) was there going to be more wounds from children. Sakura loved Naruto but all his vehement promises and grandiose speeches were worth nothing. They weren’t even worth the calories he used in speaking them because they became lies no matter who you were to him.

A part of Sakura, one that she couldn't claim - or blame to be honest- to be Inner because she was gone and it was only Sakura now, knew she shouldn't be surprised. Naruto had only wanted to be Hokage to be recognized and loved by the village. That was fine when he was a boy but as an adult? No, it wasn’t. Naruto traded his will to correct what was wrong for the admiration of the village. It’s funny how years ago (their genin days seemed a life ago) it was Sakura who wanted the white picket fence life and it was Naruto who saw something wrong, someone - anyone really - hurting and wanted to fix it. God, Sakura thought as she pinched the bridge of her nose. A part of her use to feel like a child because of losing the desire for that future despite being an adult who was not only the head of the village's hospital, the head of the clinic, and the only jonin on team seven besides Kakashi despite Naruto being the Hokage; a child who lost all interest in a toy they had tried so hard to obtain because it was pretty and out of reach. And, despite the falling out when it came to their relationship, Sasuke wasn't a toy. He wasn't a thing to be picked up and discarded on her whims even if he had broken her heart and tried to bury his hand in her chest. He deserved better than for Sakura to only hold onto him simply because it had once been her desire to and that familiarity was comforting. She hadn't meant for it to become like that but it did. 

And Sakura? Sakura deserved to piece herself back together through gritted teeth. People couldn’t fix each other in that way. In the end it was their choice to acknowledge that they were broken and try to fix it. Will they always be able to fix themselves? 

No. 

(Sakura couldn’t wholly knit herself back to the girl she use to be despite an earnest part of her that wanted to go back to being that girl.) 

But they tried. They tried. 

Sakura had come to learn not all injuries could be fixed and when that happened you either managed or you didn’t. Lady Tsunade had been there offering Sakura her first glass of sake that day when Sakura encountered that lesson; a person had died on her operating table and her teacher had told her that they wouldn’t be the last (they hadn’t been). What mattered as a medic wasn’t having a perfect record. It was that you got back into it even when you failed - when you saw someone die under your care. 

And it’s that that made Sakura open her eyes to the world.


End file.
